Category Archives: Baseball

Baseball, Sean from Massapequa

Sean from Massapequa: Bay-Bay’s Kids

Today I chat with Sean from Massapequa once again, as we discuss the Jason Bay signing.

seanfrommassapequa.jpgThe Mets finally made a big move this off season by landing Jason Bay. That fills at least one hole, doesn’t it?

Yeah, and fills it with another hole. That guy stinks.

The guy stinks? He hits 30 homers and 100 RBIs every year. He’s performed everywhere he’s been, even in a Pirates lineup with little protection.

Typical Omar move, gettin some guy who used to play for the loser Pirates. Nobody who ever played for the Pirates has ever been good, ever.

What about Willie Stargell, Roberto Clemente, Honus Wagner…

Honus Wagner? What is that, an electric spray painter?

No, he was one of the greatest baseball players ever.

I never heard a him, so he’s a bum, just like Bay!

Even if you totally want to dismiss Bay’s years in Pittsburgh–and I don’t know why you’d want to do that–he played just as well in Boston. And he couldn’t have had a stickier situation to deal with, taking over for Manny Ramirez.

Then why don’t the Sox want him back? I’ll tell ya why: because he stinks! And because he’s injured. I read this thing that his shoulder is about three seconds from bursting into flames.

He passed his physical.

Big deal. You can fake a physical any way you want. My buddy Joey’s got half a lung, a metal plate in his head, and seven toes on each foot, but he passes the fire department physical every year. See, if you think healthy, you can convince yourself and everyone else that you really are healthy, even if you’re on death’s door, which Jason Bay clearly is.

C’mon, the man is not on death’s door.

But he’s Canadian, ain’t he?

Yes, he’s from British Columbia.

See, right there, that’s another reason not to like him. There’s something weird about Canadians. I can’t put my finger on it, but they just ain’t…right, you know?

So you don’t like the Jason Bay signing even a little bit because he’s Canadian?

The only good Canadian I know is Randy Bachman of The Guess Who and later Bachman-Turner Overdrive.

Good to see that you’ve expanded your roster of prejudices.

And speaking of Canadians, why’d the Mets hand Bay a Rangers jersey at the press conference? That’s a slap in the face to the Islanders! They practically play down the road! I got a buddy who works at the Nassau Coliseum, and we coulda gotten him a DiPietro jersey for nothin!

So you woulda given Bay a discount on an Islanders jersey?

Yeah, the old five-finger discount. Listen, if you know anybody who wants some game-used equipment, we can hook you up. Jerseys, pants, pads, goal nets…you want a zamboni?

No, I don’t want a zamboni.

Cuz I can get you a zamboni. Kinda fun to drive, but it’s a bitch to insure.

Always a pleasure, Sean.

You bet.

Baseball, Sean from Massapequa

Sean from Massapequa: The Halladay Season

Today I chat with Sean from Massapequa once again, as we discuss the Hot Stove League and the Phillies’ blockbuster trade.

seanfrommassapequa.jpgFirst off, I haven’t spoken with you since the Mets suffered all those injuries last summer. How have you been?

For a while, I was in quite a state. Luckily, I had friends and family who helped me get the help I so desperately needed. I’ve spent the last few months at a retreat in the Berkshires, where simple living, meditation, and yoga have helped me manage my anger issues.

Really? Good for you!

I even stayed away from any news of baseball, to keep unnecessary stressors out of my life. I now realize that existence is suffering, and suffering is brought on by desire. In my case, it was a desire for a championship for my favorite team. I have now eliminated that desire from inner being.

You seem so centered now. I’m truly impressed. But maybe we shouldn’t talk about the Mets.

No, no, this is all part of my healing process. I can not live in a cocoon, nor do I wish to. I can enjoy the pastoral pleasures of America’s pastime without making one team’s fortunes the sum total of my existence.

In that case, the big news is the blockbuster trade the Phillies are in the process of completing, getting Roy Halladay from the Blue Jays. That’s obviously bad news for the Mets.

I would agree, if the Phillies hadn’t also traded away Cliff Lee in the same deal. From what I have read, Mr. Halladay projects to be only 0.5 wins above replacement higher than Mr. Lee next season. One could argue that they have not improved by a measurable amount. Not to mention that Mr. Halladay is 33 years old and has subjected his formidable right arm to quite a bit of work over the year. Also, whatever extension he signs with Philadelphia may impact that club’s ability to sign some of its other players when they reach free agency.

I guess you could argue all of these things, but even if the Phillies made a lateral move here, the Mets still need to make a few moves of their own to catch up. Do you think there’s any chance they can do that, given the current free agent class?

I suppose that’s still possible, either through the signing of a Matt Holliday or a similar slugger. However, I think the Mets would be best served by employing platoons at positions such as left field and first base, perhaps look for low-risk/high-reward options on the pitching market. A Ben Sheets, for instance. In the current market, it makes no sense to overpay for mediocrity. Especially considering the the 2010 free agent class looks to be far superior.

That might mean not seriously contending next season. How do you sell that to anxious fans like yourself…I mean, like you used to be?

Perhaps the Mets’ front office should remind the fans that a team’s fortunes proceed like the seasons themselves. The bounty of fall is always followed by the fallow winter. One cannot preoccupy one’s self with but one tiny spoke on the wheel of Time.

I guess when you put it that way, it makes me feel better about the Mets in general. You’re right, things ebb and flow. One day you’re up, the next day you’re down. It’s so stupid to get upset about stuff like Bengie Molina wanting a three year deal from the Mets.

ARE YOU FUCKIN KIDDIN ME?! BENGIE MOLINA?! DAT FAT FUCK WHO CAN’T TAKE A WALK TO SAVE HIS FAT LIFE?! OMAR, LISTEN UP GOOD! IF YOU OFFER MORE THAN ONE MONTH TO THAT TUBBA FAILURE I WILL CARVE YOU LIKE A CHRISTMAS GOOSE! AND I NEVER CARVED NO CHRISTMAS GOOSE BEFORE, SO IT’S GONNA BE SLOW AND MESSY!!

Whoah, you just spent the last five minutes talking like the Dalai Lama by way of Bill James, and Bengie Molina’s name sets you off?

I DON’T WANT HIM NOWHERES NEARS MY TEAM! THE ONLY REASON DIS LAND MONSTER SHOULD GO TO QUEENS IS IF HE’S AT LAGUARDIA GETTIN SHIPPED BACK TO SEA WORLD!!

Congratulations on your short-lived serenity.

YOU BETTER RENDER MY REPONSES IN ALL CAPS, BECAUSE THAT’S HOW ANGRY I AM!

Baseball

Bill Madden Wants a Fence Around the Mets

Last summer, I wrote a piece about perceptions of Jose Reyes and his hamstring injury (which turned out to be season-ending) and, in part, the racial overtones of those perceptions. In it, I blamed the portrayal of Reyes as a malingerer or malcontent on the Doughy White Guy network of sportswriters for not quite getting Latin athletes, or feeling intimidated by the large Latin presence in Major League Baseball–a reflection of many people’s similar feelings about the growing Latin population of this country as a whole.

I revised my stance slightly after reading a few tweets from Dave Lennon, Mets beat writer for Newsday. In Lennon’s opinion, no one who actually covered the team and spent time around Reyes would question his dedication. I had to concede that was probably true. It seemed most of the anti-Reyes talk came from opinion writers like Jayson Stark (whose ESPN piece set me off in the first place) and professional pot stirrers like Mike Francesa (who would’ve been sued for libel a thousand times by now if he worked in a print medium).

And then on Sunday, I read a piece (or rather, a piece of a piece) in the Daily News that made me rethink my rethinking. Because it’s clear to me that even the more traditional newspaper reporters have a problem with the growing Latin presence in baseball. Or at least know how to tap into such thinking among their readership.

madden_bill.jpgIt came to my attention thanks to a post by Andrew Vazzano at The ‘Ropolitans. The piece was about the offseason plans for a slew of baseball teams, and was written by Bill Madden. He’s sort of the News‘ Peter King type: equal parts reporter and op-ed guy. He’s been around forever, and he’s very much an old school guy. The old school that says guys should hustle, play the game the right way, and be racially pure.

I assume that last bit based on his assessment of the Mets’ hot stove action (or lack thereof):

Mets? Did somebody say the Mets? They won’t spend the money for Holliday, Bay or Lackey and apparently, they’re only interested in signing low-budget Latin players, having shown little or no interest in Byrd, Figgins, DeRosa, Wolf or even Staten Island’s Jason Marquis, while waiting for their markets to come to them. At the same time, the Phillies and Braves wasted no time in addressing their needs. Sad.

Emphasis added in case that needle-dragged-across-record moment escaped you. Unsurprisingly, later in the day, a certain word was removed from this paragraph. (Hint: It starts with “L” and ends in “atin”.) But the fact remains, his original intent was to say what you can read above.

Bill Madden can spin his words any way he wants to, but this is straight-up racist. I don’t know whether he really believes this, or just wrote it to stir the pot amongst the Archie Bunker portion of the Mets’ fanbase (which was in full force in the article’s online comments section). The fact remains, his choice of words was blatantly racist, and I can’t be convinced he was not aware of this fact. You can see a screengrab of the original page here, which includes some reader comments as well. But don’t read the comments unless you have a strong stomach or can afford to lose 20 IQ points.

Much less important than blatant racism on the sports pages: Madden is way off base here in criticizing the Mets for not making any moves yet. Because very, very few teams have made any moves of any consequence. Here are the big free agent signings so far:

  • Omar Vizquel (White Sox)
  • Chone Figgins (Mariners)
  • Billy Wagner and Takashi Saito (Braves)
  • Placido Polanco (Phillies)

That’s it. So the Mets haven’t made any big signings. That puts them in the same boat as 27 other teams. They’ve made two small signings: backup catchers Henry Blanco and Chris Coste. I’m not all that familiar with Mr. Coste’s background, but I’m gonna go out on a limb and say he is not of Hispanish heritage. I guess Madden is upset about 50 percent of the team’s free agent signings being too brown for his (or his audience’s) liking.

Also, it’s expected that, due to tough financial times, many teams will nontender even more players than usual once that deadline rolls around (December 12). That means the free agent pool will soon expand. Why rush to sign a player right now if waiting a bit means your options will increase?

His assertion that the Braves and Phillies have improved is highly debatable. The Phillies let go Pedro Feliz–an excellent defensive third baseman and a decent-enough bat–to sign Polanco, who is several years older than Feliz and hasn’t played third with any regularity since 2002. It’s often overlooked how much defense has contributed to the Phillies’ success over the last few seasons. Putting Polanco at third creates a defensive hole that their pitchers can’t really compensate for (other than Cliff Lee).

Meanwhile, the Braves essentially replaced two young relievers (Rafael Soriano and Mike Gonzalez) with two hurlers pushing 40, both coming off of major surgeries within the last year. This detail is even more alarming when you consider that Atlanta has a Mets-esque track record when it comes to keeping its players healthy. Not to mention the fact that Takashi Saito, once a dominant closer, is now basically a LOOGY; righties have destroyed him the last few years, when he’s not hurt.

And then there’s the school of thought that says the Mets can’t really address their needs with the current crop of free agents and their budget. So they’d be best served to plug up holes as best they can and not lose draft picks by signing Type A free agents. I’m not sure I agree with this theory, but I recognize it as a legitimate argument.

It’s certainly a lot more legitimate than saying the Mets only sign Latin players and don’t care about baseball because they’re always dancing merengue and eating chalupas in the dugout.

Listen: The Mets deserve tons of criticism. I have very little faith that their current manager, general manager, or ownership know what they’re doing in the slightest. I don’t think this is a smart organization, and I have no evidence that it’s getting any smarter. And I’m really worried about Omar Minaya in particular, since his job is clearly on the line, because that’s the sort of situation that might spur him to make ridiculous moves that will seriously jeopardize the team’s long-term chances.

But Madden didn’t lobby any serious charges against the team. He simply accused then of being cheap and making racially motivated signings. To do so, he had to ignore a mountain of evidence to the contrary, plus equally large piles of deductive reasoning and common sense. And for what? So he could sell a few more papers, maybe get a few more page hits as idiots scrambled to drop racist garbage in the comments section?

Madden knew exactly what he was doing. So did whichever editor allowed the article to run as-is (at least initially). Neither of them might be racist, but they were perfectly willing to tap into a deep, insecure, racist vein of their readership. I can’t decide which is worse.