Monthly Archives: December 2008

Technical Nonsense

Comment Away(?)

2 Comments

Looking at some of Scratchbomb’s site activity, I got the impression that some folks were trying to comment, but couldn’t. I changed some site settings, so hopefully that should be fixed. If it is, comment away. If you’re still having trouble, let me know and I’ll do what I can. Shovel more coal in the mySQL server, maybe.

Update 11:35am: Okay, I’ve tinkered some more. Commenting is now enabled via TypePad. So if you create a TypePad user account, you should now be able to comment. Why, Sean from Massapequa was able to comment on his own post!

Update 2:54pm: Okay, turns out I’m profoundly out of my league when it comes to writing code, because somehow I totally messed up my site trying to fix comments. So I had to start the site over from scratch. Hurrah! Bear with me as I rebuild this bitch from the floor up, and hopefully find some way reader types can comment easily.

Update 3:32pm: I think I’ve fixed things. The story of how I fixed them is incredibly boring; suffice to say, it was mostly my own dumbassery/ignorance that kept people from commenting. You should now be able to register and confirm your account via Movable Type; I can’t confirm the usefulness of other methods at this time, but you can feel free to check em out if you’re feeling adventurous. I will be re-spiffing up the site and returning the old posts later tonight.

Baseball, Sean from Massapequa

Fanning the Flames: K-Rod

I often write about the Mets on this site, but I realize that my perspective is not necessarily that of the average fan. So as the Hot Stove League heats up, I want to get the viewpoint of another Amazins enthusiast. Today Scratchbomb welcomes Sean from Massapequa, a union pipefitter and frequent WFAN caller, to discuss the acquisition of Francisco Rodriguez.
 
seanfrommassapequa.jpgSo the Mets got K-Rod. That should help solidify the bullpen, shouldn’t it?

I don’t want this guy nowhere near my team! This guy’s a bum! Get ridda him!

He’s been on the team for like six hours.

That’s six hours too long! That bum should hit the road!

How is K-Rod a bum? He broke the season saves record last year.

Big deal. Saves is a fake stat, like on-base percentage. They don’t mean nothin. He’s a bum and the Mets are bums for signin him. That’s just like the Mets, always thinkin small. Meanwhile, the Yankees go out and get CC Sabathia and steal the back pages again. How could Omar Minaya let Sabathia slip through his fingers?! I want that bum fired!

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Self-Righteous Rants, The Funny

Jay Leno and the Persistence of Mediocrity

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There are times when I feel profoundly disconnected from humanity. Like, I operate on a completely different wavelength than the rest of the world. These moments tend to occur whenever I turn on the TV. Or read anything online. Or leave the house.

I realize this is an extremely childish and narcissistic POV. Everyone feels different–Free to Be You and Me taught me that. Well, that and the inherent creepiness of baby puppets.

But how am I supposed to feel, gentle reader, when I’m told that the entire world is all a-twitter at the news that Jay Leno will host a 10pm talk show, and I think to myself, Wow, Jay Leno still exists?

I mean, seriously, people are excited about this? No one has ever been excited by anything Jay Leno has ever done. I challenge you to convince me otherwise.

leno.jpgI still don’t understand how Jay Leno got to be Johnny Carson’s successor. Who let that happen? Shouldn’t that have been reviewed by the Council of Things That Make No Damn Sense?

Johnny Carson was witty and urbane, a gifted comedian and a master interviewer. No one has ever used any of those words to describe Jay Leno, except prefaced with the word “not”.

People still talk about sketches Johnny Carson used to do on The Tonight Show. You see clips of his most famous celebrity interviews on TV all the time. Jon Stewart imitates him at least once a night. He remains the gold standard by which all late night fare is judged.

You think they’ll sell “The Best of Jay Leno” DVDs some day? Nope, and you will never say this to your grandkids:

Back in my day, we all used to gather ’round the television and watch The Jay Leno Program. I still remember the time he found a midget version of himself! And the time Kevin Eubanks pretended to laugh at his monologue for the 8 millionth time! Oh, it was magic!

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