Feel the Heat: Upcoming Chef/Band Cookbook Collaborations

In a world wracked by war, strife, and uncertainty, we recently received the heart-warming news that flame-bedecked celebrity chef Guy Fieri was working on a cookbook with Smash Mouth, which is technically a rock band. However, this sure future James Beard Award winner is but one of several forthcoming cookbooks that will feature collaborations between your favorite celebrity chefs and bands. Now that you’ve unquestioningly accepted this premise, here are but a few examples of these culinary publications.

Anthony Bourdain and Lou Reed

The original bad-boy chef and the legendary rocker swap stories about how awesome New York was when they were both hopelessly addicted to smack. Tony contributes an uncompromising 40-page rant against vegetarians, while Lou shares a special recipe for toast taught to him by Andy Warhol. Includes 8-page color insert with dozens of close-up photos of Bourdain making orgasmic faces while eating tripe.

Marcus Samuelsson and Entombed

Former Aquavit chef and frequent Chopped judge Samuelsson collaborates with his fellow Swedes, death metal band Entombed, for a mixture of Scandinavian favorites and Satanic arcana. Their book contains hints on how to acquire rare, cursed ingredients known only to the most brutal of mages who have toiled in the dark arts for untold millenia, waiting for the hour when hell shall be unleashed upon this earth. Also, a delicious recipe for lingonberry jam.

Gordon Ramsay and Liam Gallagher

The Kitchen Nightmares host and former Oasis frontman exchange their favorite recipes for traditional English pub fare, broken up by constant threats from each author to break a pint glass off in the other’s face. The only cookbook currently on the market guaranteed to have the C-word on every single page.

Ferran Adria and Bon Iver

The mastermind behind elBulli and the indie-folk band conduct an unprecedented experiment in sustainable living. Together, they repair to a cabin in a remote forest and make dishes with indigenous ingredients, creating cuisine so precious that just thinking about it can cause it to disappear. All presentations are photographed with antique glassplate cameras and printed on birch bark by a thousand birds whose beaks have been dipped in ink.

Paula Deen and Kathleen Hanna

Showing a completely different side of herself for the first time, the down-home Food Network favorite teams up with the Riot Grrrl icon to celebrate her recent feminist awakening. From the introduction: “Ah just think all these attacks on reproductive rights and attempts to redefine rape show it’s time for revolution girl style now, y’all.” Includes 100 vegan recipes and a CD single of the two authors dueting on “I Like Fucking.”

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