For the original Inappropriate Walk Up Music post, click here.

Every day until Opening Day, Scratchbomb presents three tunes that are completely, unequivocally inappropriate for use as major league walk-up music.

These are not necessarily bad songs–although that
certainly helps. They are merely songs that don’t evoke the fear and dread one traditionally associates with the walk-up song. In fact, they evoke the exact opposite.

Imagine yourself in the on-deck circle. Bottom of the 9th. Down by one. Man on second, two out. You hear the PA system blare, The centerfielder, number 20… The crowd roars at the sound of your name. And as you stroll to the batter’s box, you are greeted with the strains of one of these songs:

* Erasure, “A Little Respect”
Courtesy of CuzzinLoutie. I think virtually any Erasure song would qualify. “I Love to Hate You,” for instance, would be just as ridiculous in this situation.

* “Don’t Hold Your Love Out on Me, Baby”
Courtesy of TheWhiteBoomBoom. I can’t think of this song without thinking of the MST3K skit in which The Bots ask Joel to explain this song, and they all sing it heartily in unison. Was the group that sang this song called Hamilton, Joe, Frank, and Reynolds? Or Hamilton, Joe Frank, and Reynolds? Or Hamilton, Joe, Frank, Ann, Reynolds?

* ZZ Top, “She’s Got Legs”
That would just be weird. Also, it conjures up memories of the 80s commercial for L’eggs pantyhose that featured this song sung by a chorus of chicks. I was very disappointed to find out that L’eggs no longer come in a plastic egg-shaped shell.