Over the weekend, I saw (most of) Idiocracy, Mike Judge’s last doomed film. It has yet to achieve the cable/DVD cult status afforded to Office Space, mostly because it’s not nearly as funny. But the movie does a good job of fleshing out the universe contained in its premise: what happens when all the smart people in the world stop breeding, and the planet becomes overrun with morons?

The little cultural touches of the universe work better than the actual plot and characters. In the world of Idiocracy, the most popular TV show is called “Ow! My Balls!”, the president is a machine gun-weilding “smackdown champion”, and a film called Ass won 8 Academy Awards

Conspicuously absent from the film is what music would be like in this world. Dumb is much harder to achieve on purpose in music than in other media. In fact, I can’t think of too many people who have tried to capture the essence of Dumb in music and succeeded, other than Spinal Tap. Apart from “Big Bottom” and other Tap tunes, actual Dumb music made by actual Dumb people beats out manufactured Dumb Music by a mile.

But I think I found the soundtrack to a world filled with people with IQs of 60 (found = saw it posted to several message boards I frequent). This song is perfect for the world of Idiocracy–it’s violent, emotionally stunted, sexually
ignorant, aggressively misogynistic, and idiotic. I mean, truly, deeply idiotic.

I wanted to say “unapologetically idiotic”, but the people who made this song/video would be unable to apologize for their idiocy because they haven’t the slightest clue how idiotic they are. When I first saw this video, I thought it might be a put-on. But after a minute or so, as I fought the urge to vomit, I realized that only truly shallow morons could make music this moronic.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I present to you the absolutely worst song I’ve ever heard in my life, by the worst group in the universe: brokeNCYDE. And don’t think too hard about how these mind-corpses are already on tour and playing IRVING PLAZA TONIGHT and probably making huge bank, because if you dwell on that horrifying factoid too long, you’ll wanna kill yourself. I know I do!