The Funny, Tuneage

We Did It Again…We Did It Again…

If you didn’t get a chance to listen to The Best Show‘s second and final Pledge Marathon Night, first of all SHAME ON YOU. But hey, maybe your kid was sick or your dog was on fire or something. So if you didn’t get to listen to it, Stereogum has an excellent play-by-play for you. And no one says you can’t listen to the show from The Best Show Archives, or subscribe to The Best Show podcast, ya know.

For those of you who did listen, but would like visual evidence to accompany your fahntasies, Stereogum has plenty of pics from the event. Here’s one of my faves: Tom Scharpling in his stellar Judge Smails outfit, with co-host Therese, John Hodgman looking strangely servile, Paul F Tompkins in a Napoleon pose, AP Mike appearing not nearly as creepy as I expected him to, and just in the background you can also see Aimee Mann, Ted Leo and Terre T in their FOT sailor hats.

fotship.jpg

It’s easy to grin, when your ship has come in…
Tuneage

Cheap Jokes! Get Your Cheap Jokes Here!

Human Giant-er Paul Scheer alerted me (and the rest of the world, via his Twitter page) to the existence of the Michael Jackson Auction Catalog. Yes, the King of Pop is auctioning off some of his most priceless memorabilia–although he seems to have had no problem pricing them anyway.

Yes, poking fun at Michael Jackson is as easy as shooting monkeys in a barrel while taking candy from a baby. And yes, making fun of him is a totally hack go-to move for bad comedians everywhere. But take a look at the catalog. Go ahead, just take a look. Then tell me this is not something screaming to be ridiculed.

And it starts before you even see any items, because MJ (or his tech peeps) have insisted on putting the catalog into an unnecessarily complicated Flash interface, where you “turn” the pages on screen with a double click–and it’s accompanied by an audio file of a page turning. I feel like I’m really reading a book!

Then come the auction items. Pages 1 through 70 are pretty much all video games. Then, the fun starts. I recommend page 73, which features Item #805: a lifesize statue of Michael Jackson as Batman. I wish I was kidding about that.

The rest of the catalog features many, many mind-blowing artifacts, too many to single out in this space. Surely most of them have spent some time known as “People’s Exhibit X”. So flip through it when you have a chance. But make sure there’s a shower nearby; you’ll wanna take one when you’re done.

Baseball, Inappropriate Walkup Music 2009

Inappropriate Walk Up Music: 03.11.09

santo-shea.jpgFor previous Inappropriate Walk Up Music posts, click here.

Every day until Opening Day, Scratchbomb presents three tunes that are completely, unequivocally inappropriate for use as major league walk-up music.

These are not necessarily bad songs–although that
certainly helps. They are merely songs that don’t evoke the fear and dread one traditionally associates with the walk-up song. In fact, they evoke the exact opposite.

Imagine yourself in the on-deck circle. Bottom of the 9th. Down by one. Man on second, two out. You hear the PA system blare, The centerfielder, number 20… The crowd roars at the sound of your name. And as you stroll to the batter’s box, you are greeted with the strains of one of these songs:

* “Swanee”, Al Jolson
Weirdly old-timey or borderline racist, depending on your POV. I’d love to hear an old scratchy 78 played out of a modern PA system. The crackles and pops would sound pristine!

* “Cherry Bomb”, The Runaways
Kick-ass tune, BUT more of a kick-ass tune for kick-ass chicks. Until kick-ass chicks break into the major leagues, it remains inappropriate.

* “Freaxxx”, brokeNCYDE
Inappropriate in any context.

A potentially explosive collection of verbal irritants