Category Archives: The Funny

Online Reviews of The Three Stooges’ Moving Company

THREE STOOGES MOVING
Average review: 0 stars

jroberts72@hotmail.com ¦ 0 stars
DO NOT HIRE THESE GUYS!!1! I called them up to bring a couch to my brother’s house and they spent the whole time braining each other with pipes. The bald one kept making these annoying noises, and when I politely asked him to stop, he dropped to the floor and ran around in a circle.

Drake Tungsten III ¦ 0 stars
Drenched my rich, elderly aunt with seltzer. She’s in the hospital with pneumonia now.

floydturbo@gmail.com ¦ 0 stars
These morons let my upright piano roll down a hill and hit a streetcar! I didn’t know streetcars still existed!

juicenewton@yahoo.com ¦ 0 stars
One of them swung from my chandelier and landed in a sink full of dirty dishes. i really dont know what else i can say

Mary, Canoga Park ¦ 0 stars
Would not stop fighting for two seconds to actually do the job they were hired to do. Plus, the sound of them smacking each other was horrifying. Was I supposed to find this funny? Because I didn’t.

shitjustgotreal@gmail.com ¦ 0 stars
not even playing, I swear to god if I see these guys again i will straight fuck them up.

shitjustgotrealer@gmail.com ¦ 0 stars
i told them to start with the kids’ rooms. the next thing I know, they’re having a pie fight. I’m pretty sure they brought their own pies.

Angry in Reseda ¦ 0 stars
an entire wall of my house is missing. when i screamed bloody murder about it, they just started hitting each other again. these people should be in prison.

realjustgotshit@gmail.com ¦ 0 stars
The one with the Pete Rose hair kept calling me a numbskull. What a bunch of assholes.

Kickstarter Page for The Space Between Cushions Collective

The Space Between Cushions Collective, based in East Williamsburg, shifts the public art paradigm by creating sustainable, locally-grown couch forts. They take furniture relinquished by their owners and turn them into interactive pieces that literally change lives forever. Their upholstered installations have been seen everywhere from Flushing Avenue to several blocks south of Flushing Avenue, and have brought a sense of wonder and exploration to the previously bleak industrial landscape of the neighborhood, when not stolen or defaced by stray dogs.

Now, we want to bring our couch stylings to towns across America, and we need your help.

The Collective will travel from coast to coast, showing people how their drab, boring lives can be transformed just by rearranging their furniture. We find that when a couch is tilted against a wall and the cushions used as “doors” to enter it, the couch becomes a maze, a labyrinth, a treasure trove of discovery. It transforms from a mere piece of furniture into a world unto itself. Especially if it has a part that folds out into a bed, because those are awesome.

But the Collective doesn’t just build a fort and leave it there. For a small fee, we show passers-by how to discover these newly transformed spaces. How to look at the light trailing in through that tiny space between the couch’s arms and the floor. How to inhale the musty air escaping from the exposed padding and recognize it as the smell of freedom. And for a modest exit fee, we allow patrons to leave the fort and see the rest of their lives through new eyes.

Your funds will go toward the following details essential for our mission:

  • Repairs to the Collective’s fixed-gear van, currently in need of a new alternator, muffler, and one of those iPhone chargers you can plug into the cigarette lighter.
  • A custom mural painted on the side of the van by Britton Manship, one of Bushwick’s hottest airbrush artists. We’re thinking about a painting of a dolphin in Elvis Cotello glasses dunking a basketball, but we are open to suggestions.
  • Development and beta testing of our new couch detecting app. When completed, this app will be able to pick up the presence of an abandoned sofa from a distance of 200 yards, provided the sofa has an embedded GPS chip.
  • 13 dozen sleeves of vegan burritos.
  • New safety equipment such as shin guards, helmets, shoulder pads, etc., to deal with the inherent dangers of manipulating couch placement, such as unexpected fall-overs, rug burn, and so on.

Those who contribute to our quest to liberate the nation from the normal, boring way of looking at couches will receive our gratitude, which should be thanks enough. However, we will also throw in a premium based on your donation.

$5: A thank-you postcard mailed from a genuine truck stop.

$10: A swatch of upholstery cut from an actual couch used during our tour.

$25: A couch fort named in your honor

$50: A couch fort given a filthy name in your honor

$100: Couch fort-naming privileges and a Polaroid of your couch fort, suitable for framing

$200: An exclusive MP3 of members of the Collective singing along to a Best Coast song of your choice, recorded inside the van

$500: A genuine bit of loose change found in one of the couches

$1,000: All previously mentioned premiums, plus you can pick us up from the airport if the van breaks down

The Collective is not exaggerating when it says that this will be the most important art project in American history–even more important than that guy who tried to make a seven-story-high tall-bike. Contribute now and be a part of the magic.

FUNDING STATUS:

3 Backers

$0.73 Pledged of $95,000 Goal

12 Days to Go

TomThon Part Two: Nerds in Paradise

This is a friendly reminder that the second installment of TomThon takes place tonight. If you have not yet pledged some cash to keep the freeform station of the nation on the air, now is the chance. If you have pledged already, you are awesome. Maybe you can be even more awesome and dig a little deeper? Give it some thought.

Last week, I gave everyone a litany of reasons to donate funds to WFMU. I won’t repeat all of those points, though if you want some more, Julie Klausner posted her own reasons for donating at Gothamist. But I will reiterate why you may want to donate during tonight’s installment of The Best Show on WFMU. A mere $75 dollars will not only get you some great swag from the station itself, but also:

  • A Best Show poster drawn by legendary comic artist Charles Burns (Black Hole, Dog Boy)
  • The amazing Wu-Tang-esque Best Show t-shirt seen here
  • A 7″ called “Rated G.G.,” containing cleaned-up versions of G.G. Allin songs performed by Ted Leo, Fucked Up, Ben Gibbard, and many more
  • A digital download of said 7″, which also includes not only the single’s contents, but some ultra-rare material from Scharpling & Wurster, among others

For TomThon Phase One, host Tom Scharpling gave away some amazing random prizes, too, such as a Monty Python DVD boxed set signed by Terry Gilliam. If you donate this week, you will be in the running to win prizes that are just as fabulous. What could possibly be as fabulous? How about:

  • A single and LP signed by Conan O’Brien
  • A copy of I Am America signed by Stephen Colbert
  • Books signed by Chris Elliott, PLUS a copy of Daddy’s Boy signed by both Chris AND Bob Elliott

As if this wasn’t enough, there will be other fantastic giveaways autographed by tonight’s in-studio guests. That includes Mr. Leo and Carl Newman, who will stop by the studio for the second week in a row for your musical enjoyment. They will be joined by songsmith Kurt Vile and wordsmith John Hodgman, and I’m sure all of them have awesome things planned for the event.

What if you can’t actually donate during the show for some reason? Just email toms@wfmu.org with your pledge. You will be in the running for any and all prizes given away during the show. Sound good?

I did some phone slaving this weekend at the WFMU studios, and trust me when I say that every donation is welcomed. I took more than a few $15 donations, and if that’s what you can spare, it is more than appreciated. Altogether, we raised over $11,000 for Terre T’s awesome show. Every little bit helps.

Tom has also issued a challenges to see who can get the biggest celebrity to RT this event on Twitter. I’m just throwing this out there on the off chance that I have any big shots who frequent this site. Or, maybe you’re a regular schmoe reading this site who knows some big wigs yourself, in which case you could get them to RT and win said challenge. By all means, do it. That way, we all win.

And again, if you can’t spare cash, spare some time to spread the word on Twitter, Facebook, your blog, any message boards you frequent, random telephone poles, whatever. It all helps.

Tune in, turn on, and turn out (your wallets), tonight at 9pm. DON’T STOP NOW.