I hope pain don’t hurt for you this holiday season.
The Swayziest Christmas of Them All
I hope pain don’t hurt for you this holiday season.
Category Archives: The Funny
The Steinbrenners Keep on Fiddling
STEINBRENNERUS: Have you gotten my first baseman, Seneca?
BRIAN CASHMAN: Um, it’s Brian, but yes, we have signed Mark Teixeira.
STEINBRENNERUS: Bring him forth.
STEINBRENNERUS: Ah, but he’s a strapping buck of a man! Can he perform?
MARK TEIXEIRA: Well, I’m pretty much guaranteed for 30 homers and 100 RBIs every year.
STEINBRENNERUS: Ah, this pleases the Steinbrenner! Yes, he shall provide me hours of amusement! Place him over there with the Sabathia and the Burnett.
He Went to Jared!
GIRL 1: Ooh, Jen’s texting us from her big date.
GIRL 2: He brought her roses!
GIRL 1: That’s sweet! So anyway, my supervisor is such a bitch! She’s always giving me a hard time about…oh, it’s Jen again.
GIRL 2: Did something happen?
GIRL 1: No, she just wanted me to know that he took her to Chez Francois.
GIRL 2: That sounds like a made-up name for a French restaurant.
GIRL 1: Totally. So anyway, my supervisor…oh, for fuck’s sake, what now?!
GIRL 2: Just turn your phone off.
GIRL 1: You don’t know this broad. She will totally call me to make sure I got all of her riveting text messages. And then she’ll tell me the exact same things that are in her text messages. She’s nuts.