Category Archives: The Funny

Olde Holy Goddamn, Podcast, The Funny, Tuneage

Holy Goddamn! 001 – The Gentle Scream of a Dying Tongue

winger.gif

Oh, you thought you could kill it, didn’t you? YOU CAN’T KILL IT! HOW CAN KILL DEATH ITSELF!

Of course, “death itself” in this case refers to Holy Goddamn!, the official Scratchbomb.com podcast, which makes its triumphant return to the interweb airwaves TODAY!

In episode 001, I speak on my current preoccupation with Food Competitions, and interview the proprietor of Winger’s, which will explain the presence of that horrid ad just above you. Plus, I spin some tunes (listed below for you completists), interspersed with some obscure sound clips that no one but me will remember or enjoy. Fun!

How can you get all this audio hotness? Well, you can play it in your web browser by clicking on the audio player below. If you want to subscribe to the podcast and you have iTunes, click here. Otherwise, you can click on the xml feed contained in the banner above your head or in the navigation bar just to your right. Or here, if you’re really lazy.

Oh, and you’re welcome.

Holy Goddamn 001 Selist:

Cupid Car Club, “Grape Juice Plus,” Cupid Car Club M.P. 7″
Minor Threat, “Salad Days,” Discograpy buy
Elijah and the Ebonites, “Hot Grits,” Eccentric Soul: The Capsoul Label (v/a)     buy
Jay Reatard, “All Over Again,” Singles 06/07 buy
Future of the Left, “Manchasm,” Last Night I Saved Her from Vampires buy
The Zombies, “Care of Cell 44,” Odessy & Oracle buy
The Hold Steady, “Slapped Actress,” Stay Positive buy

Baseball, The Funny

Philly Takes It on the Road

Somewhere in the Dominican Republic:

/ding dong

reyes.gifWho is it?

jroll.jpgWho is it?! World effin’ champions, that’s who!

hamels.jpgYeah, and we’re here to tell you that the Giants are goin’ DOWN on Sunday!

reyes.gifI don’t think the Giants play again until April.

jroll.jpgPfft! You thought we were talking about San Francisco, you DUNCE?! No, we’re talking about the NY Giants. Or should I say, the NY TINIES, because they’re gonna feel two feet tall once they get stomped by the IGGLES!

hamels.jpgHow bout dem birds, baby? The firm leadership of Donovan McNabb! The explosive running game of Brian Westbrook! The competent blocking of L.J. Smith! They’re gonna poop all over the Giants’ heads like a red convertible fresh out of the car wash!

jroll.jpgAllow me to imply that the following members of the Giants are gay: Eli Manning, Brandon Jacobs, Antonio Pierce, Phil Simms, Frank Gifford, Y.A. Tittle…

Continue reading Philly Takes It on the Road →

Politics Schmolitics, The Funny

Senate Democrats: Fixing Glitches

reid.jpgAlright, moving on with our Senate confirmations, what’s the deal with this Roland Burris fella from Illinois?

bobs.jpgThat’s a funny subject. Seems he was appointed by a disgraced governor, and no one ever told him that this was gonna be a huge issue. I don’t know how he couldn’t figure that out on his own. But anyway, we made sure the Illinois secretary of state didn’t sign his certificate of appointment.

reid.jpgSo we’re rejecting his appointment?

bobs.jpgNo, see, we fixed the certificate so that you can’t officially accept his appointment. So the problem’s fixed from your end. We try to avoid conflict as much as possible.

reid.jpgMm hm.
Later, in the Senate chamber:

burris.jpgExcuse me, I’d like to sign the roll book now, because I’m the junior senator from Illinois and…

reid.jpgYeah, Burris, we’re gonna need your office to put some old files, so I’m gonna need you to take your press conference on to the Capitol steps.

burris.jpgYes, but I was told that I would be a senator by the man with the crazy Richie Rich hair…

reid.jpgYeah, so if you could get on out of the Senate chamber as soon as possible, that’d be great.
/raps cubible wall with knuckles, walks away

burris.jpgOkay, so I’m go back to Illinois and burn Blogojevich’s house down.