Skitch Hanson will be joining us later this week to preview the NFL championship games. In the meantime, I have finally added his Scratchbomb oeuvre to the new site. If you’d like to revel in his mastery of the sporting language, click here.
You can also check out Skitch Hanson’s exciting Twitter updates here.
“Most N.F.L. stadiums now post telephone numbers for fans to send text messages to summon security personnel…By using text messages to summon security guards,
offended fans do not have to confront fellow spectators who may react
with verbal abuse or violence; they need not look obvious when seeking
ushers or guards.” — NY Times, 1/10/09
philly fan taunting me bout mets collapse even though i’m wearing a jeter jersey. help!
just saw guy in freddie mitchell jersey. srsly? wtf!
blinded by tom coughlin’s red red face
sitting in sec 127, clearly see mcnabb not harrassed all day. disgraceful.
cannot see field, too many yellow flags.
huge fat ass blocking like 90% of my view. oops, sorry, it’s andy reid.
puked into urinal, can’t flush it down. lil help?
pickin up weird sense of superiority and entitlement from philly fans. think apocalypse is upon us. repent!
Today, we preview the weekend’s playoff games with a whole buncha celebrity guests. To discuss the exciting Baltimore-Tennessee matchup, here’s Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis, who agreed to talk with Scratchbomb as long as I didn’t broach certain subjects.
This has to be a great season for the Ravens. No one expected you to do anything this year, and now you find yourself one win away from the AFC Championship game. How does that feel?
I always believed that we could cut through the competition in the AFC, ever since training camp, when I saw Joe Flacco firing those absolute daggers down the field.
He’s turned out to be quite a draft steal.
I bet there’s a lot of teams out there who feel like stabbing themselves for passing him up!
That’s a curious turn of phrase, but yes, I would think so. Of course, the backbone of your team remains the defense, with veterans like you and Ed Reed. How do you stay so fresh after so many years in the league?
I don’t know how you can’t stay fresh! This is the greatest job in the world! Every time I go out on the field, it’s like the first time I put on pads. I just wanna go out there and slash that offense to ribbons!
So how do you explain your continued success? Is it a strong work ethic or a rigorous training regimen?
Any success I have in my life, it all comes from my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Through Him all things are possible. When I let Him into my life, it was like I’d been stabbed in the soul with a 13-inch knife. But His knife filled me with love and forgiveness, rather than caused me to bleed to death from my carotid artery.
That’s some curious religious imagery.
Faith is a curious thing. To the faithless man, it may make no sense. But to those who believe, it’s an exhilirating, transcendent feeling. The only thing I can compare it to is, oh, I don’t know, stabbing two guys to death and totally getting away with it.
C’mon, you’re not even trying anymore!
It’s so hard, man, it’s so hard.
SB prediction: Ravens 24, Titans 12.