Category Archives: Football

Football

Useless Super Bowl Predictions: Mike Francesa

I wanted to get some Super Bowl predictions from football experts, but then I realized that  football experts tend to be horribly, horribly wrong most of the time. So instead, I decided to think beyond the usual expert parameters and ask some other types of people for their takes on the big game. First up, professional Diet-Coke-and-snack vacuum Mike Francesa.

fran1.jpgI’ve like the Steelahs chances to win the whole thing for a long time. A long time. Week 3, I think I liked them. A lot to like about this team. A lot. There’s a lot to like. With this team, there’s a lot to like.

Cawdnals aren’t just gonna lie down, though. Dey’re here to win. Dey’re gonna play tough. Dey’re a tough team. Dat is a tough team, the Cawdnals. Tough. That’s what I’d call them. A tough team. No doubt, they’re a tough team.

Butcha gotta like Roethlisberger. He’s been there. He knows what it’s like. He’s acquired knowledge through prior experiences. Roethlisberger’s someone you gotta like. You really do. A lot to like with him.

You know who he reminds me of a little bit? Bradshaw. Just a little bit. The teensiest bit. A little bit reckless. Not too much book smarts, but he knows how to win. Bradshaw was like that. Ben’s got just a bit of Bradshaw in him. Just a bit.

/inhales entire 2-liter bottle of Diet Coke

But hey, you gotta like the other guy, too. This ain’t Warner’s first trip to the Big Dance, either. He’s been through the wars, that guy. Through the wars. He is a warrior. You do not count him out. A warrior, that guy.

You name the guys, any guy you can think of. Warner’s not with those guys. But he’s close. Real close. He’s almost one of those guys.

Alright, let’s take some calls. Tom in Riverhead, you’re on the air.

Hey Mike, I love yer show, I think you are the best thing to happen to radio, I worship the ground you walk on. I was just wondering if we could talk a little Yankees right now…

A little Yankees? A little Yankees? It’s Super Bowl Friday and you wanna talk a little Yankees? Let me tell you somethin, you wanna talk baseball on Super Bowl Friday, you are lost. Lu-host. You do n-hot talk baseball the Friday before the Super Bowl.

This is gonna be a close game. I see it bein close. Back and forth. Someone leads, then the other team leads, then the first team leads again. It’s gonna be a dogfight. A close game. A real close one. Game. Close. Football.

Football, Skitch Hanson

BUMP: Up the Middle with Skitch Hanson: Live from Tampa!

sbxliii.gifOriginally posted 1/26/09

Scratchbomb has its own man embedded in the doody-storm that is Super Bowl Media Week. Frequent contributor Skitch Hanson will be providing us with breaking news and other updates via his Twitter page, which you can view by clicking here.

If you have any questions for Skitch or you want him to check out anything in particular, just comment on this post and the word will get his way. I’ll be bumping this post frequently as a friendly reminder to the curious.

Football, Skitch Hanson

Up the Middle with Skitch Hanson: The Keys to the Keystone State

Scratchbomb hands over the reins to nationally syndicated sports columnist Skitch Hanson, as we’ve done many times before. You may know him as the author of the highly popular syndicated column “Up The Middle.” You may also have read his best-selling book I Liked It Better When Home Run Hitters Drank Like Fish. He’s also a frequent guest on ESPN’s sportswriters panel show 4th and Forever. Without further ado, here’s Skitch.

Within the week, we could witness something truly historic. Something that people have been waiting for, hoping for, some even praying for, for years. Centuries, even. And when that moment happens, I will stand and applaud with my fellow Americans, maybe choke back a tear, and wonder what wonders the future holds for all of us.

Of course, I’m speaking of the possibility of an all-Pennsylvania Super Bowl.

Some people like to think of how far we’ve come, but I wonder why it’s taken us this long. Do you realize that before this weekend, two Pennsylvania teams had never even made the semifinals of any major professional sport at the same time? That is a shame our nation must live with.

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