It’s been a busy time at Scratchbomb HQ, and I haven’t had the chance to work up anything significant for the site the last few days. Please accept this video of footage from the old Lawrence Welk Show synced to Minor Threat’s “Seeing Red” as an apology.
All posts by Matthew Callan
The Parallel Universe Fake Mets: Games 23-25
Game 23: Mets 2, Phillies 0
The Fake Mets managed 2 runs in the top of the third when Fake Carlos Beltran hit a bases-loaded, two-out single off of Fake Cole Hamels. They wouldn’t get another baserunner until the ninth, but that was all they needed. Fake Oliver Perez pitched eight brilliant innings, and Frankie Rodriguez worked around a two-out single from Fake Chase Utley in the bottom of the ninth to preserve the win.
In real life: The Mets scored early and often against Phillies’ starter Kyle Kendrick, while Jon Niese turned in 7 great innings, as they cruised to a 9-1 win, their eighth in a row.
Game 24: Phillies 3, Mets 1
Fake John Maine gave up homers to Fake Shane Victorino and Fake Raul Ibanez, while his teammates could only scratch out one run against Fake Joe Blanton.
In real life: After a great April, Mike Pelfrey came back to earth, undone by some sloppy defense and a six-run fourth inning. Roy Halladay was in control the entire game and went the distance in the 10-0 loss.
Game 25: Mets 1, Phillies 0
The Fake Mets could only manage one measly run against Fake J.A. Happ, that was all they would need. Fake Jon Niese and three relievers combined for a shutout to take the rubber match of the series.
In real life: This game never happened. Move along, nothing to see here.
Once Again, the Internet Wins
There are many things to not like about the Interweb. Sure, maybe information travels too fast and trends are hocked up and discarded with little care and people say things to one another online they’d never dare say to each other’s faces. And don’t get me started on the comments section of most sites. Even sites I enjoy immensely have an insane amount of douchetacular commenters.
But obviously, since I’m writing this for a webbed site, there are plenty of things to love about the internet. Overall, I’d have to say World Wide Web (c) has been been a force for good in the world. And now this theory has been scientifically proven.
How? By this amazing, amazing, super amazing game called Super Mario Crossover. It came to my attention thanks to a tweet by Wezen-Ball.com (the site that calculated the baseball stats for Charlie Brown and his horrible team).
This game is essentially the original Super Mario Brothers game, BUT you can not only play as Mario. Oh no. You can also play as one of five other characters from classic NES games: Simon Belmont from Castlevania, Samus Aran from Metroid, Link from The Legend of Zelda, Mega Man, and one of the dudes from Contra (they call him Bill R.).
Each character can pretty much do what s/he does in their original game, only they’re doing it in the world of Super Mario Brothers. So you can whip Goombas with a boomerang as Link, or literally whip Koopas as Simon, or just blow blocks away with your arm cannon as Mega Man. And as you play, you hear the music from the original games, too, which changes as you progress through the boards (in the underground World 1-2, when you play as Link, you hear the theme from Zelda 2).
You will waste countless hours playing this. You should waste countless hours doing this.