All posts by Matthew Callan

The Parallel Universe Fake Mets

The Parallel Universe Fake Mets: Games 29-31

Game 29: Giants 2, Mets 1
The Fake Mets could only scratch out one meager run against Fake Barry Zito, and that came on a ground-out double play by Fake David Wright in the first inning. Meanwhile, to further emphasize the inherent unfairness of MLB10:The Show, the Fake Giants tied the score in the fifth when Fake Bengie Molina hit a two-out triple (!) (no, seriously, (!)) that just eluded Fake Jeff Francoeur’s glove, then went ahead immediately thereafter on a Fake Freddy Sanchez RBI single. Fake Brian Wilson struck out the side in the ninth (around a Wright single that briefly gave the Fake Mets hope) to preserve the win.

In real life: K-Rod wasted a fine effort by Mike Pelfrey when he gave up a two-out, pinch-hit homer to John Bowker in the top of the ninth, but they salvaged a victory with a two-run walkoff homer by Rod Barajas in the bottom half.

Game 30: Mets 4, Giants 3
The Fake Giants took a 3-1 lead in the top of the sixth when a botched sac bunt play was followed by an inside-the-park home run by Fake Edgar Renteria (aided by the goblins inside MLB10:The Show, which refused to let me switch to the right fielder, who might have actually fielded the ball). But the Fake Mets rallied for 3 runs in the bottom of the ninth, the last scoring on a walkoff RBI double by Fake Jason Bay.

In real life: Once again, the bullpen allowed a starter’s fine outing to go by the wayside (Santana in this case) and let the Giants tie up the game late. And once again, a Mets catcher came to the rescue, as Henry Blanco hit a walkoff homer in the bottom of the 11th.

pufm031.pngGame 31: Mets 1, Giants 0
The Fake Mets could do almost nothing against the immortal (fake) Madison Bumgarner until Fake Jeff Francoeur hit a two-out single in the bottom of the seventh to plate Fake Jason Bay. Meanwhile, Fake Johan Santana flirted with history as he was perfect through 8 2/3 innings, but pinch hitter Fake Andres Torres hit a parachute single into shallow left field to break up the no-no. Johan stayed on to get the last out and give the Fake Mets a series win.

In real life: The Mets fought back to overcome an early 4-0 deficit (and the supremely crappy pitching of Oliver Perez) and tie the game, but Jenrry Mejia gave up a two-run shot to Aaron Rowand in the top of the ninth, which proved the difference in a 6-4 loss.

Parallel Universe Fake Mets record: 14-17
Real Mets record: 17-14

The Parallel Universe Fake Mets

The Parallel Universe Fake Mets: Games 26-28

Game 26: Mets 1, Reds 0
The Fake Mets’ bats were silent against Fake Aaron Harang until Fake Jeff Francoeur led off the top of the seventh with a home run. They would get no more runs, but they would need no more, thanks to a stellar complete game shutout from Fake Johan Santana.

In real life: Oliver Perez turned in a decent outing, but the Mets left several scoring opportunities by the wayside, and the Reds were walkoff winners on a pinch hit homer by Laynce Nix in the bottom of the 11th.

Game 27: Reds 3, Mets 1
The Fake Mets scratched out a run in the top of the first, thanks to a wild pitch from Fake Edinson Volquez (who is neither injured nor suspended in this universe). But they could do nothing else, as they grounded into an astounding six double plays. Fake Ramon Hernandez hit a two-run homer in the third, and Fake Joey Votto hit a solo shot in the sixth to account for Fake Cincinnati’s scoring.

In real life: The Mets let a 4-2 get away from them when Fernando Nieve gave up consecutive solo home runs to Joey Votto and Scott Rolen. But Rod Barajas hit one of his own off of Francisco Cordero in the top of the ninth, and Frankie Rodriguez made the 5-4 score stand up.

pufm027.pngGame 28: Mets 3, Reds 1
Fake David Wright belted a two-run homer off of Fake Bronson Arroyo in the top of the fourth, and Fake Jason Bay added an RBI double in the top of the eighth to account for all of the Fake Mets’ scoring. Fake Oliver Perez turned in a great outing, going 7 2/3 innings, and Fake K-Rod earned his sixth save of the year.

In real life: The Mets rallied to tie the game at 4 against Francisco Cordero in the top of the ninth, but Pedro Feliciano gave up a walkoff homer to the first batter he faced in the bottom of the 10th (Orlando Cabrera), and thus the Reds took the series.

Parallel Universe Fake Mets record: 15-13
Real Mets record: 12-16

Baseball

Nathan Thurm Charlie Manuel Explains Himself

nathanthurm.jpgCharlie, what do you say to accusations that your team has been stealing signs?

I’d say that those accusations…I’d have to see who was doing the accusing before I rushed to any judgment.

Your team was formally reprimanded by the commissioner’s office for stealing signs. This complaint I have here…

I know what that is.

Let me finish, please. This complaint I have here was lodged by the Rockies after they spotted your bullpen coach using binoculars to try and steal signs from their catcher. What do you have to say about that?

Yes, the Phillies have been stealing signs. Don’t you think I know that? It’s my team. I’m quite aware of that!

And this is not the first time the accusation has been lobbed at your team. The Dodgers complained about sign stealing during the last NLCS, and the Mets suspected sign stealing during their last series in Philadelphia.

How about this: The Mets have won a lot of games at home and not so many on the road. Have you ever thought that maybe they’re stealing signs? Why don’t you go ask them about that?

Even though they just lost two out of three at home to the Nationals.

Maybe you’re stealing signs. Have you ever thought about that?

I don’t manage a baseball team.

Why does it have to be a manager of a baseball team who steals signs? Have you ever thought about that? It’s not me, right? It’s him, isn’t it?