Get Metsmerized! with Tom Scharpling and Patton Oswalt

metsmerized.jpgAfter yesterday’s screed about the sorry state of the Mets and their desire to kill their idols, I thought some levity was in order. So please enjoy this clip from The Best Show on WFMU from August 18, 2009, in which host Tom Scharpling and famous comedienne Patton Oswalt listen to and riff on the only thing worse than the current Walter Reed ‘controversy’: “Get Metsmerized!”

“Get Metsmerized!” was the brainchild of George Foster, the Mets’ first big free agent signing (and first big free agent bust). Like many of his teammates, eve before the 1986 season began, he figured the team would have a great year. (Even as a Mets fan, I’d say Tom’s description of the ’86 Mets as “sociopaths who could hit baseballs” is pretty accurate.) So what better way to capitalize on a great year than a hastily produced rap song? The Chicago Bears had such a big hit with the “Super Bowl Shuffle” the year before, so surely this would be a big hit, too!

It was not, for the eight billion reasons you’ll hear in this clip. Hip-hop was still in its relative infancy, and in most people’s minds, rap was something that anyone could just do. “It’s just talkin over music! A kid could do that!” Foster and his chosen teammates (Darryl Strawberry, Doc Gooden, Lenny Dykstra, Rafael Santana, Howard Johnson, Kevin Mitchell, Rick Aguilera, and Tim Teufel (!)) proved this wrong once and for all.

As Patton points out, “They even yell off-key.” He also notes that roping poor Santana–who could barely speak English, let along rap–into this mess borders on “a hate crime,” and it’s hard to argue otherwise. Run DMC, this is not.

In an effort to make up for “Get Metsmerized,” later in the 1986 season, the entire team collaborated on a song/video (“Let’s Go Mets!”) that actually wound up being a local hit. While it is also cheesy and 80s-rific, it sounds like “Good Vibrations” compared to this atrocity.

Many, many thanks to @arfortiyef for supplying the clip you’re about to enjoy. You guys should probably follow him on the Twitter and read his site, too.