The Parallel Universe Fake Mets: Games 17-19

Game 17: Mets 7, Braves 4
The Fake Mets took an early 3-1 lead, thanks to a massive first inning two-run homer by Fake David Wright. But the Fake Braves tied the game with solo homers by Fake Troy Glaus and Martin Prado. After the Fake Mets blew a chance to get Fake Jason Bay home from third with one out in the bottom of the eighth, Fake Yunel Escoabr hit a home run off of Fake Bobby Parnell to put Atlanta up 4-3. Fake Billy Wagner came on to try to earn a save, but two hits and a Wright sac fly tied the game anew, and Fake Carlos Beltran clubbed a three-run home run to give the Fake Mets a walkoff win.

In real life: After John Maine fled the game with a mysterious ailment in his non-pitching arm, Ike Davis hit his first major league home run–a 450-foot bomb to the Shea Bridge–to tie the game at 1. As Hisanori Takashi turned in a brilliant relief performance, the Mets went ahead with two runs in the seventh, then got two more in the eighth thanks to Atlanta’s unfamiliarity with the finer details of the infield fly rule. Frankie Rodriguez allowed two base runners but danced out of danger to preserve a 5-2 win.

Game 18: Braves 6, Mets 4
Fake Ollie Perez struggled in the first, giving up two-run homer to Fake Chipper Jones and solo shot to Fake Troy Glaus. The Fake Mets came right back with three runs in their half, the last two scoring on a long two-RBI double by Fake Daniel Murphy. Fake Ollie settled down for a while, but gave up another two-run longball in the top of the sixth, this one to Fake Nate McClouth. The Fake Mets scored another run on a wild pitch in the bottom of the eighth, but could not complete the comeback.

In real life: Jon Niese danced in and out of danger all day, allowing plenty of baserunners but somehow only one run (with the aid of some sloppy baserunning by Yunel Escobar). Jason Bay tied the game with a long RBI double in the bottom of the sixth, and an RBI triple by Jeff Francoeur and a sac fly by Henry Blanco in the seventh put the Mets up 3-1. Pedro Feliciano stranded two runners in the eighth, and Frankie Rodriguez lodged his third save in as many games.

Game 19: Mets 8, Braves 3
John Maine pitched seven solid innings; his line would have looked better, but for a potential double play grounder that inexplicably skipped past Fake Daniel Murphy, leading to a two-run inning (it literally zipped past his feet, at a range at which fielders usually reach down and catch balls with ease). But a three-run homer by Fake Carlos Beltran in the fourth opened up a big lead for the Fake Mets, and a pinch-hit three-run shot by Fake Angel Pagan in the seventh put the game out of reach.

Since I’ve bitched about how unfair this game can be, I should make note of one way in which the game hands the user an advantage: the computer’s bullpen management is atrocious. Throughout this series, Fake Atlanta would bring in lefty relievers like Fake Eric O’Flaherty to face dangerous righty batters like Fake Wright and Bay, something not even the dumbest real life manager would do. Such AI incompetence allowed me to mount or extend many a rally. So thank you, dumb computer.

In real life: Mike Pelfrey somehow extended his scoreless streak, though it took him 106 pitches and a few double play grounders to negotiate his way through five innings on a raw, rainy night. Jose Reyes manufactured a run in the first by singling, stealing second, and dashing home on an errant throw by Chipper Jones. The rain came for good just as the game went official and gave the Mets a 1-0 win and a weather-aided series sweep.

Parallel Universe Fake Mets record: 7-12

Real Mets record: 10-9