The Awnings of Queens: Village Deli and Grocery

borkbork.jpgCorner of Fresh Pond Road and Elliott Avenue, Ridgewood.

“Okay, I’ve got your lighted sign order: 17 feet long, your logo, picture of breakfast platter, large sandwich, Swedish Chef, NY Lottery logo…”

“Wait, what was that last bit?”

“NY Lottery logo?”

“No, before that.”

“Swedish Chef?”

“Yeah, I didn’t order that.”

“You sure? I got it on the work order.”

“No, I don’t want the Swedish Chef on my lighted sign.”

“Okay, but how about we throw it on there anyway? It’ll look real classy.”

“How will the Swedish Chef look classy?”

“He’s from Sweden. It’s European. Exotic!”

“He’s not actually from Sweden. He’s a Muppet!”

“Look, our in-house artist, he does a really good Swedish Chef. He loves to throw it in his work. It’s like Hirschfeld and Nina. Except in this case, you don’t have to hunt for Nina, because it’s really huge.”

“No, I’m paying a lot of money for this thing and I don’t want a Muppet in it.”

“What if we knock $300 off the price?”

“…fine.”

“You will never regret this!”