Rex Ryan Laments Blown Opportunities

Thumbnail image for rex.jpgYeah, it definitely hurts to get this close and not make it just one step further. And for two years in a row now. But what’s really gonna keep me up at night is how much trash talking we coulda done.

That’s what got us here, from Hard Knocks all the way through the win against the Patriots. We just talked smack about everyone and everything, morning, noon, and night. Then we face the Steelers and all of a sudden we don’t say anything. Not a peep. That’s what killed us–we got away from our game plan.

But I don’t blame my players. I put this all on me. I had so many insults ready to go, both overt and veiled, and I didn’t use them. I took a cue from Wes Welker and wrote up a whole buncha press conference responses, all of which used the word “rape” in them, but then I thought that would’ve been in bad taste. I gotta hand it to Mike Tomlin and his team–I never would’ve thought anything was in bad taste a week ago.

And even if we didn’t go for the obvious digs at Roethlisberger, there’s so many petty details we could’ve shit-talked about. Like, “hey, what’s up with Polamalu’s hair?” or “your stadium is named after ketchup!” Maybe those seem like little things, but hey, little things win championships.

We coulda done it over-the-top, black-hat style and insulted the entire city of Pittsburgh. Maybe we could’ve downplayed the accomplishments of the labor movement. Maybe we could’ve mocked steel, maybe? “Iron, carbon, chromium, what kinda dumbass fuckin alloy is that?” Then maybe the Steelers would’ve been driven insane with rage and made a buncha mistakes. Oh well, guess we’ll never know what mighta been.

The only thing we can do is work harder. Develop better insults in the off season. Find new and creative ways to be dismissive of your opponents. Draft some athletic loudmouths out of college. And above all, never, ever stop talking. Because talk is cheap, and who wants to pass up that kinda bargain?